Thought of the day:
Law and Gospel describe how we give and handle criticism.
There are two ways to criticize another person. The first is to tear down, and the second is to build up. There are likewise two ways to perceive criticism. The first is that the critic is tearing you down, and the second is that they are building you up.
Tearing down looks like judgment. It is the force of an external law bearing down on you any time you fail to meet its standard of perfection. For example, imagine you bake dinner for your family and it sadly turned out a little overcooked, and you set it down before them, and they turn to you and state with the air of disapproval, “The food is burnt.” This kind of criticism highlights and creates shame.
Building up looks different. If you are the one who builds up, you don’t care about accidents. You see burnt food set before you on the table and you don’t say a word, firstly, because you know that the giver never intended to burn the food (only an enemy would intentionally burn food before giving it to someone), and secondly, because the giver clearly already knows (or soon will) that the food is burnt (so calling it out wouldn’t inform them of anything), and thirdly, because calling out the fault in that moment would not be expressing thanks for the gift. And if the giver apologizes with fluster, “Oh, the food got a bit burnt,” you forgive and respond cheerfully, “We forgive you! It happens! It’ll still eat, and it tastes fine. Thank you for putting it together, and we thank God for these gifts He gives us.” The one who builds up does not accuse failures. “Love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Pet. 4:8)
When those who build up do critique, they do so to help someone flourish and to grow in a goal they already want to pursue. For example, imagine someone is baking bread and forgets to set a timer, and a friend notices and lets the baker know. The friend is building up by helping the baker succeed in their original goal. They are not trying to judge or create shame.
But shame and guilt and judgment can go deeper that single interactions.
Some who are already under shame tend to perceive all corrections as if they were meant for tearing down and for causing more shame. Imagine that our baker grew up ALWAYS receiving shaming responses like, “You burnt the food,” for everything they did that didn’t turn out absolutely perfectly. When their friend points out that the timer wasn’t set, the baker might hear that primarily as a sign that they also failed to do their baking perfectly. This baker still bears the weight of the shame they received in the past. They hold themselves to the same strict standard that they grew up underneath. So they judge themselves as a failure for once again not being perfect in this act of baking bread. And they perceive their friend as judging them too. They cannot hear their friend’s help in a way that focuses on the good goal while the demands of strict perfection and the burden of past shamings hang over their heart, and while they live in constant fear of further shaming.
But those who have no shame can perceive a criticism as something that builds up (sometimes even when it wasn’t intended that way). Such a person can hear the comment about the oven timer as a helpful correction, and they can benefit from it gladly and maybe learn from it, the way it was intended to be received.
So it is with the Law of God. Christ has set us free from the debt of sin. He gives us God’s Law not to make us obligated to the letter of the law but to build us up in the Spirit of the law, to make us flourish in wisdom and in love—to be the best people we can be and want to be. But someone who is under the weight of shame only hears the Law as further shaming and as a standard that cannot be met. To that person, the true purpose behind the Law is veiled. (See 2 Cor. 3:12-18.) To such a person, God is seen wrongly as an angry judge. Such a person only experiences the Accuser.
The Gospel is why God is not an angry judge for us. When mankind fell into sin by rebelling against God, we justly incurred shame and the judgment of death. God is just and could not ignore the penalty we earned. So God covered our shame (as He covered Adam and Eve with the skins of the first sacrifice) by paying the penalty Himself. The heart of the Gospel is that God has removed both our shame and our obligation to the perfect standards of the letter of the Law, and has replaced it with a promise of inheritance of His eternal kingdom. So we have confident hope in looking forward to paradise with Him, and we know no accuser can take that inheritance away (Rom. 8:31-39).
Because of the Gospel, God’s Law builds up. If God had not removed our shame, then we should be like the person who perceives all criticism, even helpful pointers about oven timers, as more judgment and shame and tearing down (and we would rightly expect capital punishment from God). But God has removed the enmity between us and Himself. He has given us His Spirit to know His will and press toward it with joy as we await our promised inheritance. (See Phil. 3:7-14.) And God does now discipline us as sons (Heb. 12:6-7), in love for building up, so that we do flourish.
But preaching the Gospel that makes this life of joy and building up possible is insufficient if you then live life criticizing your brother in a way that only tears down and doesn’t build up. If your Christian brother or sister sets food before you and you habitually respond with, “The food is burnt,” you recreate the shame that Christ took away. You wound their conscience and create a barrier against their joy not only in the making of daily bread but also, through how they come to view themselves, in their hope for God’s promised inheritance and their ability to hear God’s Law in the Spirit rather than for the letter.
Criticism that builds up doesn’t create a love for the good. It channels it. Love and hope and joy and desire for the good must preexist the criticism, or else the criticism will only be received as that which creates shame and tears down.
The proper care of souls for anyone God has given you follows God’s own example: First remove shame from the repentant soul through the good news that the debt is paid, that you and God both forgive them, and that the promise of their inheritance is sure. Then, and only once you recognize that they have the spark of joy to pursue the good in a way that welcomes assistance and critique, you can build up their spirit to grow in that good and to accomplish it.
The weak in faith and in hope need the love of others to cover the multitude of their sins. And if they see you as someone who lives in hope (as with 1 Pet. 3:15), then where the Gospel creates the spark of love in them (“We love because He first loved us.” 1 John 4:19) they can share that hope with you by walking alongside you and emulating you, just as you emulate Christ.
When there is joy and hope from the Gospel, then the Law and helpful criticism has its place in the life of the redeemed.